Just an off night :(

I wasn't going to even post tonight. It's not that I did bad I just could have done a lot better. The only reason I decided to post was to remind myself that not every night is going to be good and I just have to focus more. My mind was all over the place tonight. It was anywhere but in that workout, and I'm sure everyone could tell. The strength part of the workout was 7 power snatches with a minute rest in between each one. My arms hurt from yesterday so I was just lifting the 45# bar until Chase insisted that I could do more (I knew he was right). I added 20 more pounds and did the majority of the lifts with that weight. James came over when I was almost done and asked why I hadn't been increasing the weight. I told him I wasn't sure I could do anymore. He told me that I always underestimate what I can do. I knew he was right, but I'm still afraid of failing. If I keep the weight at a level I know I can do then I know I won't fail.  It has to be the right night for me to actually believe I can go up in weight (and increase it by myself). I did add weight and ended up power snatching 80#. I could have probably done more if my mind had been in it though. Then we did the workout. My workout was modified because I can't squat right now. Everyone else did 5 back squats, 1 rope climb, 4 back squats, 1 rope climb, 3 back squats, 1 rope climb, 2 back squats, 1 rope climb, 1 back squat, and a final rope climb for time. While they were doing back squats I was doing push presses and instead of the rope climb I laid on the ground and pulled myself up to a standing position with the rope 3 times for every one rope climb. This is the first time I have ever done this. It was pretty hard but apparently,as hard as it was, I was doing it wrong and was doing it the easier way. Oh well. I won't even mention the time, even though it wasn't bad, because it should have taken me longer to do it. I should have done more than the 65# on push presses. If I had it would have taken a lot more effort on my part and would have increased my time. Tonight was an off night but hopefully tomorrow I can actually focus and get some stuff done.